He was supposed to be with fire, those Archers, those Lions, those Rams, but they had never interested him because it didn’t work the way it was said to. No, it was much more complicated than the position of the sun, and those who lived their lives by it were deluding themselves, if it had any truth at all.
He had dated a Taurus once, but the Taurean heart only desired the physical, and, once that waned, there was nothing to pursue. Love for them was lust. As she was plodding in mind, he had found the experience lacking in any discovery. Though she was not dumb, she possessed a skull as thick as concrete to the penetration of new ideas.
He had dated one like him, same sun anyway, and, while the loyalty was unbreakable while the bond existed and there was an unspoken understanding, she had been of the low character side, exemplifying the negative traits—cold, unmovable, unreasonable, and, ultimately a malignant narcissist, who had taken pleasure in causing him grief for its own sake. Though long in coming, the break was bad.
He had been with Libras, supposedly a high-born match. But Libras were at the mercy of their whims, one day a loving-eyed soul, the next having taken umbrage at something loved the day before, one day committed to the hilt, the next imagining another life. It was impossible to love two people in one body.
Cancers and Virgos had eluded him, and that was fine from where he stood, seeing nothing that would ever constitute a relationship beyond friends, and that, only with Cancers. Pisces and the Scorpion had been absent as well, in all things but one of his closest friends, a representative of the latter, and his total inverse.
No, he, cursed by his own Ascendant, was doomed to fall for Capricorns, who comprised the majority of his experiences, some good, some horrible, all temporary. He did not understand the pull, as Capricorns, while magnetic for him, were slutty, little self-absorbed assholes … and so untrue, born cheaters and liars, trapped in their childhood-imposed dogmas. They were prone to take offense and disappear for things they had misunderstood or simply made up, simply vanish as if they’d never known you, and they never forgave because, once they stopped caring, there was no remorse, no sense of loss. Moreover, their every move was a calculation, looking for advantage, especially in money and social clout, things he despised. But when they had set their eyes upon him, he could not refuse them. Yet, once they had moved on, their past was not even a memory to them, no lessons learned, following a path that never turned. Even so, they were fun when it mattered.
His greatest love had been one of these inexorable goats, and his greatest pain had been inflicted by the same. So he, finally, swore off the entire menagerie. His zodiacal amalgamation having made him incompatible with anyone.